by Sam Nanfito
Being a part of Jim Sharon’s men’s anthology has been a provoking, rewarding, and sometimes taxing process. Jim first asked me to be a part of the project in September or October of 2010; I can’t say exactly when because my life has been in such constant motion that I am just now starting to catch my breath. During those first weeks of knowing about the project, my story started to take form.
I was just moving into a place where I was going to be a stay-at-home father, and was dealing with the changes of becoming a father and homemaker. I have also been practicing yoga for the last decade. These endeavors have been viewed as traditionally feminine activities. Finding the balance of masculinity and femininity in my life, being nurturing and loving, while still being a strong man, was the cornerstone of the story I had to tell.
During the writing process, I found that there were so many avenues that could be explored and so many ways this one story could be told. And it lead to other stories that I might have told, or will tell in the future. The story of being a stay-at-home-dad with my son Kingsley is only one that I explored.
Another story that may be even more compelling and singular is that I also have a son only 3 months older than Kingsley, my son Max who lives in Denver. The paradox of being so connected to Kingsley on a daily basis and having little-to-no contact with Max is a constant exploration in my life. This project provided me the opportunity to really assess and take deeper examination of these subjects. It was hard. It was great. And it was freeing. During this project, I have moved from Denver to El Paso, El Paso to Long Beach, Long Beach to Los Angeles, where I sit today and type. So much growth has happened in these various modes of life, and I am thankful for the platform that Jim has provided to put some of these experiences into words. Hundreds of new stories have sprouted from these adventures, and I’m glad at least one has landed in this anthology. I look forward to reading the other stories in the book, knowing just how much goes into sharing these stories as a window into our lives and growth.
Samuel Nanfito is a creator and artist. He creates as a father, husband, friend, guitarist, painter, meditator, yogi and yoga instructor, hiker, bartender, engineer, and a growing human being. His latest incarnation as a stay-at-home father has shaped his life in unexpected, challenging, and beautiful ways. He and his son, Kingsley, stroll the neighborhoods of Los Angeles in search of adventure and inspiration.